Alternative Energy

I have found the new idea to save America and the world! We, Jeff, Mel and I, were driving up to the SLC airport. Along the freeway right by the Point of the Mountain are a few wind turbines. As I was looking at them and wondering why people think they are ugly (they are quite magnificent), I saw there was no building or transfer station. Or whatever, the building that turns the raw power into usable energy. So my mind flipped through possible scenarios, ending with a wire that ran underground.
From there it gets even stranger. I don't even know how my mind skipped. I had an epiphany for our energy woes. America could run on STATIC ELECTRICITY. It's brilliant. It's a source that doesn't have to cost much, just the supply of carpet and socks. All the unemployed American's would finally have an income which would boost the economy and make it so politicians could focus on more important matters like the cost of paper back text books. There would be this giant building with the best carpet (scientific research would tell us which one would give off the most charge.) and have the non-freeloaders "Party" Shuffle around. Now this is where some engineering would come in handy. Of course we can't just have the workers just touching big metal pillars, the Unions would eat us alive for burnt nerves. But maybe a hand held jar that would collect the charge and could then be connected to something... Yeah, I'm not an engineer nor a technician, so someone else will have to figure that out.
So if you have any beneficial advice to my world changing epiphany, feel free to share and get a cut in the new market. There's plenty of shares to go around.